You can smell the seasons changing. The nights are getting longer. The cotton candy skies will soon fade away. Summer time will soon come to an end and a new season will begin.
School supplies are being purchased, bed time routines are changing and my sense of freedom is slipping away.
This summer has been so relaxing. I got to spend every day with my kiddos. Staying in pj’s til we were ready to start the day and not being in a rush for anything. For the first time in a while, I was able to read outside, enjoy the blue skies and just breathe. I’m so thankful for this summer.
I know each phase of life brings something new and maybe a bit weird at first. This was the first summer I didn’t have to work during the day, missing out on the pool or slip and slide. I was able to really embrace the sunshine and make memories with my girls.
This phase of life will be short lived and I pray we can embrace this free feeling for the next few summers. That is, until my kids no longer want to hang with mom and go off with their friends to have their own adventures.
Next week, my oldest starts kindergarten. School all day. It’s going to be so weird for me to only have my youngest at home. Rae and I have a pretty tight bond and to have her away for the whole day will be an adjustment. In a sense, it’s freedom for both of us. But still bittersweet.
What I’m about to say with be a complete shock for those of you that know me really well. (Mom, brace yourself….)
I’m not looking forward to fall. YET. I know, I know. It’s your favorite holdiay Kari. What is wrong with you?!
I’m so afraid that once the next season hits, I’ll be full of anxiety and not able to control it. This summer, I have figured out that the sunshine helps me stay calm. The blue skies bring a sense of peace that I’ve never felt before. This sense of adventure may go away when the air gets crisp and the sunsets early.
Maybe I just need to move my family to the beach. Maybe, just maybe, that’s God’s way of telling me that’s where I belong. Can you imagine.. growing up in the middle of the country. Moving to an ocean?! Yes please. I can already picture my morning coffee with that view. Running on the beach every day. Oh Lord, let’s make that happen. I’m sure that’s the best anxiety medication out there.
In the mean time, I’ll be in my back yard, reading a good book, soaking up as much sun as I possibly can. Trying to cure my anxiety, hanging on to every last bit of summer.