Having Littles

This chapter of my life has been full of so many emotions. Everyday is different.

I can’t even believe I’ve been a mom for almost ten years now and honestly still have no idea if I’m doing it “right.”

In those ten years I know I’ve grown as a person period, but I hope to God I’ve become a better mom. I pray that my children see me trying to be better every day. For them. For me.

Each of my children has their own personality, which means I have had to figure out how to talk to each of them.

Having girls, means a lot of emotions. But some of us in this house have very soft hearts and cry over everything.

Yes, I am one of them. And so far, my middle is the same way.

Over the years I’ve tried to find the right balance of work and mom life. I don’t think my sanity can take being a stay at home mom totally, but even working part time I have mom guilt.

I am their person.

Their safety.

Their cheerleader.

I love that I really have been there for all the important events and the lazy days spent at home. Some day they will see that, I believe it. And getting to leave the house to work at the salon a few days a week is a complete blessing.

It’s time with adults, doing what I love, making a little extra money for my family. Being mom comes first but getting to work a little is good for my soul.

Some days I feel like I am totally killing it in the mom game. The girls are happy when they wake up. When the youngest naps during her regular time, we are winning. The house gets cleaned. Dinner cooked. Fun had.

Other days we all struggle.

Nothing goes as planned. I work too late. I’m crabby + tired. They played all day outside and are also crabby.

My goal is to always let them know that tomorrow is a new day. We get to decide what we make of it.

They are only little once and I hope I’m making the most of it. I pray I’m not just in survival mode everyday and actually enjoying these days.

Motherhood is so hard.

Some days are all tears, others are so great. I pray that I can learn to see it all as a blessing. It’s making me a stronger person and role model for my girls.

My main goal for the summer was to have fun with them. To laugh every day and not go to bed with regrets.

Lately I’ve seen my girls grow right before my eyes. Snuggled them in bed and really soaked up everything about them.

Lord thank you for these children and the chance to be their mom.

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